Blessing Day

Here is a picture of Joseline in her blessing outfit. It was a crazy day! She had a leaky diaper about 20 minutes before we were supposed to leave for church, so her tights and bloomers got a quick wash and dry just before we had to leave! We found the dress Saturday night at Ross after we realized that my mom hadn't brought the dress I was blessed in. It turned out okay, though, because we also found a beautiful blanket and the cute little silky white shoes! Joseline was all dolled up for her special day. As soon as I have a few more minutes, I will post more pictures from our awesome weekend! But at least you get to see Joseline in her little dress. I'm pretty sure she is at least as big as Vincente was when he was blessed, at he was almost 2 months old when he was blessed. I'm pretty sure that green dress is 3-6 mos. But isn't she beautiful!! Of course, I am completely biased!

A Date

These are pictures from our most recent date... yeah, it was before Joseline was born - when my mom was here. She told us to get the heck out of the house while she watched Vincente. We didn't ask questions, and we didn't stop to think about where we would go - we just got in the car and went.

As we were driving, alone, talking about what we should do with our few hours of precious, blessed freedom, we realized it was 6pm on a Tuesday night, and the Farmers' Market would just be closing down, so we headed over. We got some delicious Mexican food and a sinful piece of chocolate chocolate cake (the cake we got for FREE - yay coming to the Farmers' Market at the last minute).

We wanted to sit somewhere and eat, so we went down to the Fisherman's Wharf (the part with just old fish shops - not the part with restaurants) and sat in front of a little eatery that's only open for breakfast and lunch - the tables and chairs were chained together, but they were still sit-on-able, so we sat and ate our dinner. It was the best date I've ever been on - but maybe that's just because we have been date-starved for so long. First, school and work taking over our lives, then basic training, and

master builder

Today was soooo hot. We went outside for a while in the early morning, but Vincente didn't want to jump on the trampoline for very long because the sun had made the trampoline very hot. 

So once Joseline was ready for her nap, we came inside and Vince and I played blocks for a while (oh, did I mention the power went off just after breakfast? That's why we went outside and played blocks when we were inside... no TV to occupy Vincente. I think the power outage was actually really good for me - forced me to do things with Vincente, even though I'm still getting over this nasty infection).

         

Vincente is getting a lot better about handling ... frustration? Yeah, I think that's what it is. When his block towers fall over, he now laughs about it and says "caia" - "fall down" in Portuguese. He used to scream and throw a trantrum and say "No fall down!!" So I think we're making progress in the dealing-with-our-emotions department.

     

Playing with him was so much fun - he's so smart, and loves to play, it reminds me of being a kid and how much joy I got out of life. Wow, I wish I could be more like that again. Being grown-up is not nearly as much fun as being a little kid. I just need to remember to find pleasure in the simple things in life. Like playing with my two-year-old. I love that kid so much.

a dog

No, we didn't get a dog (although we've been talking about it lately - we want to get one sometime this summer, but we'll have to see how finances work out).

I have been sick as a dog - hence the no blog posts. But I repenteth , and shortly to follow (hopefuly today) will be some posts updating you on what we've been doing around here.

An update on my health - I have mastitis, it hit suddenly on Sunday during 3rd hour of church (I was sitting in Primary trying to keep our 10-12 year olds in line). I thought it was just a bug or something, and rested a little after church to see if rest would get rid of it. I had checked my temp when we got home from church - no fever. After my nap, a 102 F fever. And chills. And crazy sick feeling. That's when I realized that it was probably mastitis - I had it with Vince, too - in the same breast :-6 It's funny that I didn't even notice the sore spot in my breast until Monday evening, after I took a shower. And it got worse. I was taking Tylenol to keep the fever down, but it only got down to 100 degrees, and occaisionally just below that. Anyway, my OB prescribed me an antibiotic, and I picked it up yesterday evening and started taking it right away. I feel much better today (well, no fever, at least - even without Tylenol). I feel like I've gone 15 rounds, but I somehow managed to have enough energy this morning to do the dishes, make breakfast, and do a few loads of laundry - that is, before the power went out. Yeah, the power was out for about 3 hours. Luckily, most of those 3 hours (it may have been 4, now that I think about it) was during nap time. Joseline napped in her bed, Vince napped in his bed, and I napped on the couch because currently the 75% of our laundry (the clean stuff) is taking over my bed. The power turning back on startled me out of sleep because the washing machine, dish washer, and all three fans turned back on all at once. Our house went from creepily quiet to busily loud all in a second.

So, we're back in functioning mode - power's back on, and Mamãe is feeling mostly good again.

Now to the blog.

Arm Charm

This morning, Vincente found Russ' deoderant in his PT bag and came into my room rubbing it on his elbow. He was wearing a shirt, so I guess he couldn't get to his armpit. I can't have my kid thinking deoderant goes on your elbow, so I took off his shirt and told him that deoderant goes in your armpit. Then he went walking around the house putting arm charm in his "armmit." 

sleep, glorious sleep

I think Joseline is finally figuring out the whole day/night thing. She still has her evening "fussy time" as I call it, but yesterday it happened earlier in the day - which means bedtime ends up being earlier! (and I'm hoping it will do the same today!). She's starting to be more alert when she's awake, and sleep less easily during the day (i.e., she doesn't guarenteed fall asleep in the car on the way somewhere. She may nod off, but will wake right back up when we get wherever we're going. Last night she fell asleep at 8:30, stirred around 9:30 (i.e., woke up, sort of) - I was able to soothe her back to sleep without picking her up! She slept until 6am, with a feeding around 2am.

I'm hoping this will continue tonight. So far things are looking okay!

Now, I'm no expert on newborn sleep, but I've been reading a lot about sleep, and looking specifically ways to teach your newborn how to sleep. Unfortunately, because babies aren't usually developed enough to figure out the sleeping thing until after 6 weeks, most sleep books say just that - "Your baby will probably not learn how to sleep well until after 6 weeks, so don't worry about it now." Okay, so they don't say it just like that, but basically, that's what all of them are saying. Most books on sleep training don't even give any practical advice until your baby is around 4 months old. So I have been scouring every bit of reading material for things to do to help your newborn sleep well - because I believe that you can at least do something. Most sources had one or two good ideas, but none of them had enough to give you an arsenal of ways to get your baby to sleep. I think hitting them with everything you've got is usually the best way to go.

First, before I continue - three very important points to convince yourself of. Do whatever it takes to really REALLY believe these three things, and you will save yourself a lot of frustration and tears:

• Newborn babies are not really sleep-trainable until six weeks after their due date (now, before you get all discouraged, READ ON!)
• There are some things you can do to try to help your newborn's sleep organization mature a little faster - just don't hang all your hope on it.
• The term sleeping through the night, for a newborn (i.e. younger than 4 months) is 4-5 hours.

Okay, now that you've got that through your head, here are the things to do to help your newborn sleep through the night earlier (while these things may not necessarily work right now, be assured that they will eventually help - and if you get used to doing them now, you may avoid problems later):

• Turn on the lights/open the blinds during the day (when the sun is shining), and when the sun goes down, keep the lights low (or off) where your baby is in the house. It's really tempting to keep the lights on in the evenings when you wish your baby would go to sleep, but she's not, so you're up doing things like the dishes, watching a movie, playing on the computer, etc while you wait for baby to decide to go to sleep. I'm not saying doing these things are bad - just try doing them without the lights on (okay, doing the dishes will probably be kind of hard). This will help baby adjust faster to light=daytime, dark=nighttime. Remember, baby just game from 24hr darkness, so the more you can do this, the faster baby will figure out the light/dark thing. I think this is the most effective idea I found.
• Keep stimulating activities to a minimum after "bedtime." You get to decide what "bedtime" is - Since I would eventually like Joseline to be going to be around 9pm, that is what I call "bedtime." The most surprising thing I found out about stimulating activities is that eye contact is a stimulating activity for babies! Making eye contact with a baby causes their pupils to dilate, raises their heart rate, and all that other crazy stuff. So, no eye contact with baby after the time you want them to fall asleep.
• Put your baby in his/her bed to sleep. This idea was from The No-Cry Sleep Solution. I didn't have any problem with this, but her experience convinced me that this is pretty important - she always let her baby sleep in her arms during the day, and so her babies wouldn't sleep in their cribs at night since they just wanted to sleep in her arms. So, the best way to get baby to sleep in his/her bed at night is to...? You guessed it - let him/her sleep in his/her bed! So during the day, for naps, make sure your newborn naps in his/her bed.
• Try to soothe without picking them up after you've laid them down to sleep. It makes sense. Just let them lay in the crib/cosleeper/bassinet/whatever and try to get them to go back to sleep without picking them up. It worked last night for me, I'll let you know if it keeps working.

So, I think for newborns, those are the key ideas. There's not much else you can do for your newborn (and remember, Joseline is only 3 weeks old, so by newborn I mean REALLY newborn). After 6 weeks, basically any sleep book will have good advice for helping your baby develop good sleep habits. Most people don't give advice for how to help your newborn sleep through the night starting from day 1, so this is the list of what I have found that is really newborn sleep advice.

Oh yes, and one more piece of advice - make sure your husband is as convinced as you are of the first three facts (mostly the one that says pretty much no matter what, you can't expect your newborn to sleep through the night until after 6 weeks).

wishin' and hopin'

Joseline is sleeping really well at night... she's just still 3 weeks old. I guess I shouldn't expect too much. For a 3 week old, she sleeps really well. My only complaint with all the sleep books I've been reading is that they all say that newborns can only handle being awake for about 2 hours at a time, then they need to sleep. Well, that's a bunch of bull, because for some reason, Joseline can handle being awake for 3-4 hours in the evening. Crying the whole time unless we're holding her and bouncing her and walking around. The surprising part to me is that she doesn't fall alseep, and if she DOES start to close her eyes, she wakes up right away. She won't even really sleep in our arms. 

During the day she follows the predicted pattern for newborns - awake for 1.5 - 2 hours, asleep for a few hours, up for a few hours, alseep for a few hours. So I just can't figure out why she won't fall asleep at night. Once she does fall asleep, she's out for good - all night long. The problem is she won't completely fall alseep until midnight. Which I guess is okay, but it's not like she'll let me do anything for the several hours she's awake (from about 8pm til midnight). She wants to be held and rocked - but sleep?! HA! Preposterous! (that's what's going through her head, I'm sure). She fights and fights and fights sleep at night. I can tell she needs to sleep - her eyelids are all droopy, her eyes roll back in her head, she's really mellow - but actually falling asleep is out of the question. I'm convinced that she's fighting sleep... but a 3 week old, fighting sleep? I know that can be normal once babies become more social around 6 weeks... maybe Joseline's just socially advanced?

We have a bedtime routine, I've tried keeping her up during the day (which just results in an overtired baby who won't sleep at night at all - I'm not doing that one again), I've tried making sure she doesn't nap for longer than about 2 hours at a time, she naps in a room with plenty of sunlight, but still calm and quiet so her nap sleep is good quality. She's well rested during the day (and in the morning, when she finally wakes up). I nurse her right before "bedtime" - by "bedtime" I mean the time at night (usually around 8:30-9pm) when I notice her drowsy signs and I start trying to soothe her to sleep. Yeah. It doesn't work. She doesn't fall asleep. Even if she falls alseep nursing, she won't stay asleep (and she's not used to nursing to fall asleep, because that's not how she falls alseep for naps... so it's not the whole "put baby down when drowsy but awake" thing, because she falls asleep fine for naps without nursing). 

I'm almost ready to resign myself to the fact that she will just be fussy at nights and go to bed a midnight (this has been basically what's happened ever since she was born). And then she'll sleep fine all night long (she'll sleep until 5 or 6am, and then go back to sleep until I wake her up at 8am). All the books I've read and all the advice I've seen says that babies just don't have the mental development to sleep correctly until they are six weeks old. So three more weeks of this, and then hopefully she'll start sleeping earlier.

I don't remember having problems with Vincente sleeping at night... but then, that was 2 years ago... you forget a lot that long. I know Vincente was sleeping through the night at 4 weeks. Ha, so I guess he didn't even start sleeping the 4-5 hour stretch at night until he was 4 weeks old. I guess Joseline's already working out better than that, so I shouldn't complain. And after that, we never had sleep problem with Vincente (until the nap problems that I've been solving recently - and those are all but history!).

I guess there is hope, and the end is in sight for the earlier bedtime for Joseline. If I can just hold on to what's left of my sanity for the next few weeks, I know things will get better.

less TV, more fun

Now that I'm settling into my "new normal," I have decided that it's time to get back into a routine of actually playing with Vincente. I used to be really good, and then I got hugely pregnant, and then overdue, and then had a baby, and I've been letting Vincente watch a lot more TV than I really should. So, from now on, he gets to watch TV until Joseline takes a nap in the morning - then, it's time to do something more exciting and stimulating! I've put together two lists - things to do inside, and things to do outside. That way, if it's too cold/windy/rainy outside, we'll have things to do inside. I only made my list because it's easier to remember all the fun things to do together if you write them down. I've discovered that boredom leads to boredom - when you're bored, it's a lot harder to find fun things to do. It's like the creative part of your brain shuts down. So I made my lists so that I will have no excuse. After Joseline goes down for a morning nap, I'll check my list and engage Vincente in something much more exciting than watching Cars over and over again (or The Land Before Time). This is actually a really good idea, because he only likes all the PBS shows that come on before Sesame Street. He doesn't like Sesame Street. Sometimes he'll watch Elmo's world at the end (because he loves Elmo) but only for a few minutes. It's odd. He likes Clifford, LOVES Super Why, and Curious George. He'll sometimes watch Sid the Science Kid, but that's an iffy one, too. 

So, starting tomorrow (because it's already the afternoon... and it took him FOREVER to fall alseep for his nap) we'll have less TV and more fun. It'll be better for me, too. Then I'll do chores while both babies are sleeping. I think Vince had such a hard time going down for a nap today because we hadn't done anything today :-p So from now on, our mornings are going to be nice and stimulating!

My New Normal v 1.2

I haven't been posting my New Normal lately because I have been way busy with everything else going on and trying to post pictures from birthday parties and such. So anyway, here is a conglomeration of the past two days of "normalness" -

8am - Joseline wakes up (it varies between 8-9am)

get Vince breakfast, nurse Joseline

get myself breakfast, nurse Joseline again

around 10am - Joseline goes down for a nap!

while Joseline is napping, I usually find time to get myself ready for the day, do a few chores, and some days (like today) blog a little bit

12am - lunch for Vince, feed Joseline when she wakes up from her nap (morning nap is usually only about an hour long)

1pm - get Joseline down for afternoon nap

after Joseline is down, get Vincente down for afternoon nap (read my post about getting Vincente to go down for a nap - it's getting sooo much better)

while the babies nap - take a little 30min-1hr nap, do some chores, blog, read a book (thanks to the library I have some pretty good reading material now!)

after nap - feed Joseline, play with Vince, hang out around the house

5:30pm - start dinner (I've realized that I have to start making dinner a little earlier than I used to so I can take a break to nurse Joseline if needed)

6:30pm - dinner

7:30pm - start Vincente's bedtime routine

8:00pm - Vincente bedtime

get Joseline down (around 9-11, although if we don't go to bed with her, guarenteed she'll wake up - she'll sleep fine out in the living room while we watch a movie, but will not for the life of her sleep in her bassinet alone. Sometimes at night she won't even sleep in her bassinet - she wants to be on the bed between the two of us - I've even tried putting a piece of my (worn) clothing in her bed with her, so she can smell me, but that didn't even work)

Last night, Joseline went to sleep at about 8:45pm. We put her down in her bed, and around 9:15 she woke up. We were watching Die Hard 4, so Russ went and got her, I nursed her for a little bit, and around 10pm, she fell asleep in her bouncy chair while we finished the movie. We put her in her bed around 11pm, and she mostly stayed asleep until 4am (by mostly stayed asleep I mean she made some noises in her sleep around 11:15, and we thought she was waking up, but she didn't wake up). I nursed her at 4am, but she wouldn't go back to sleep. Russ rocked her for a little bit and sang to her, but she still wouldn't go back to sleep. Finally around 5am, I nursed her a little more (laying down) and I guess she went back to sleep because I didn't wake up again until 8:45am when Vincente showed up climbing into my bed (Joseline happened to be awake, too!). So all in all, I'd say I got a pretty good amount of sleep last night.

I feel like I'm getting used to how things are. I'm starting to get a little more solid sleep most nights, I'm mostly able to work out the nursing with doing other things during the day (grocery shopping, going to the insurance office to get a new car insurance policy, visiting friends, park day, going to the Farmer's market, etc). It's nice not to feel so trapped at home becuase I can't get myself and two kids ready and nurse Joseline enough to get out of the house. Now I can and it feels amazing. If I plan it just right, we can do anything, and enjoy it, too. Yesterday I was able to get both kids their naps, go out to the insurance office, and in the evening go to the Farmers' market - our family and another family from the ward. It was awesome. Then Vincente went right to bed, and Joseline slept all night. I couldn't have asked for a better day.

And I'm starting to get used to the fact that for some reason, Joseline has a really hard time staying asleep at night. If I put her down for a nap, she's out like a light and stays out for her whole nap (about 1 hour for the morning nap, about 2-3 hours for afternoon nap, and about 2 hours for an evening nap around 4pm). But when she's ready to go to bed at night, she can usually fall alseep, but won't stay asleep. Really not sure what to do about that. Maybe it will just work itself out as she gets older (that's what the sleep books say).

Happy Birthday Party

I told Vincente a few days before his birthday that he was going to have a birthday party with cupcakes and balloons and "BradleyConnor" (Trisha's boys - Vincente has given them one name... "BradleyConnor"). Anyway, the party was schedule for this past Saturday, instead of the Saturday after his birthday because his birthday weekend is (and always will be) General Conference weekend. He woke up on his birthday and I told him "Today is your birthday." He kept saying "Happy Birthday party! Cupcakes! Balloons! BradleyConnor!" And I kept having to tell him that his party wasn't until next week. Well, then I felt bad, because when Russ came home and wished Vincente a happy birthday, it started all over again. So when I went grocery shopping, I bought cupcakes and a balloon, and we had a little family birthday party for Vincente.

Here's the video of that night:

The birthday party was a blast. It turned into a barbeque and lots of friends showed up - and lots of little kids. They jumped on the trampoline for a while, having a blast, and then we had "Wes-burgers" (Trisha's husband, Wes, makes a mean hamburger, and

we appreciate him making the burgers for Vince's party - they were great!) and hot dogs.

Of course for dessert we had cupcakes (I was up til midnight the night before making the cupcakes, and had to wake up early Saturday morning to frost them... that's what I get for lack of advance planning...)

Here are the kids jumping on the trampoline. I spent most of the time inside with other moms, because it was really cold outside, but when I saw the videos of the kids jumping, I told Russ that it looked like popcorn popping. They are sooo cute.

Notice in this video how right when Vincente blows out the candles, the little kids converge on him and his cupcake. Heh, you can tell what they want!

I had a great time, and it was fun to play hostess. I appreciate all our friends for coming - it really meant a lot to me. Oh yes, and BradleyConnor got Vincente a beta fish! We named him Copernicus. Vincente loves him a lot. It's the perfect first pet to have. And Vincente feeds him and everything! (I clean the fish bowl, but I think letting a two year old clean a fish bowl could cause problems) Thanks, Powers!!

the princess reigns

And here she is, in all her glory! :)  Things are getting better - I'm learning how to handle Vincente AND a newborn at the same time. It's hard when we're out and I have to already focus on something else and Joseline, and then Vincente wants my attention (like today getting our car insurance set up 8-o ) but it's getting better. We've also decided to start ingnoring Vincente when he cries out of frustration. He was getting really good at "using his words" as we call it, instead of crying when he was mad/sad/needed help/etc. Then Joseline came along, and suddenly it's like he went backward. I think it's because Joseline gets attention right away when she cries, so it should work for him, too, right? Yeah - newborn baby cries are much less annoying than two-year-old-who-can-talk cries. Vincente has amazing language skills, especially for a bi-lingual kid. He can express himself pretty well in either language. He has the vocabulary (and know-how) to ask for help, for something to eat, for exactly what he wants to eat, to play, to go outside, etc.

Anyway, so on Sunday we decided to start the ignoring-the-cry game. Wow, it's hard. We used to say "Vincente, please use your words," when he would start crying, but I believe that reacting to his crying/tantrum throwing at all has just reinforced it. So now we don't even say anything. To balance out the ignoring, we're trying to be extra mindful of paying attention to him when he's not crying. Just talking to him more, holding him more, playing with him more, etc. All in all I think we're doing an okay job. He cries less, after only three days of "ignoring" and when he does start to cry, he stops within a few minutes. Having a little sister around is really hard for him - especially beacuse she's so little and helpless. He doesn't like that we help her more than we help him. I think they'll get a long great once she's old enough to do some things on her own (and once she develops speech or sign language skills enough that we expect her to cry less, too). 

It's been really nice to have our family grow. I think it's great for Vincente to have a sibling, even if it's a rough adjustment right now. I've been waiting for him to have to share our attention with someone. None of our other children will get to feel what it's like to have Mamãe and Papai to themselves every day. I've been worried about Vincente spending too much time as an only child. And I love loving more babies. Sometimes I think I worried about being able to love all my babies, but it's amazing how your heart grows to fit in your new family member. I didn't have to stretch my heart to fit around my whole family - it's like it grew extra appendages so it could reach all the way around. I really really love my babies - all three of them ;) Even the one that's 6'4". They are the loves of my life and I don't know what I would do without all of them. My beautiful family - I love them SOOOO much!

silent return to sleep

A friend of mine read this book to teach her baby good sleep habits. She wrote a very positive review about it on her blog, and so I recommended it to a friend of mine whose 3 month old is having a hard time sleeping longer than 2 hours at a time at night. 

Then I thought, hey, maybe I'll check it out from the library and read it myself. It turned out to be a very good investment... I guess the fact that I didn't pay anything makes it a very good investment - gotta love the library.

Well, I read it at first with the idea that it would help me make sure Joseline developed good sleeping habits. Vincente was already sleeping 10+ hours at night and taking a good 2-3 hour nap during the day. I learned a LOT about sleep and the need for sleep and how our bodies develop sleep habits. I discovered that when I delay Vincente's afternoon nap for any reason, it makes him overtired and that explained the reason he was waking up throwing a tantrum after late naps. Dr. Weissbluth says that he is confused and disoriented which causes him to be emotional and unconsoleable after a late nap. The reason I was ever postponing Vincente's nap was mostly that I was just waiting for him to become so tired that he would crash on his own. Vincente has always been really good about soothing himself to sleep at night, but has never been very good at soothing himself to sleep for a nap. That was never a problem when he was a little younger, because it was fairly easy to get him to fall asleep by rocking or whatever. But now that he's a little older, he fights and fights and fights sleep. Well, Dr. Weissbluth recommends doing the "silent return to sleep." It works for little toddlers who won't go to bed at night, and I discovered that it works for little toddlers who won't stay in their bed to take a nap during the day. Basically it works like this - when your little sneaker gets out of his bed at night, you pick him/her up without a word, without even looking at their faces, and put them gently back into their beds without a word. You don't scold them for the behavior, you don't talk AT ALL. This clues them in to the fact that night time (or nap time) is not "play with mommy/daddy" time - it's go to sleep time. Now, I am of the mind that if your kid gets out of bed because they've had a nightmare, it's totally okay to soothe them and love them and talk to them, but I think Dr. Weissbluth would say the same thing. The "silent return to sleep" is just for the curious little toddler who won't stay in his/her bed. Like Vincente - he just likes to get out to play.

Yesterday, Vincente and I laid down for his nap, I read him a book, sang him a song, and said "Have a nice nap." Then left his room. I heard him get up and start playing with his toys, so I went back in, picked him up, and gently put him right back in his bed. The second time he got out of his bed, I went in to get him, found that he was poopy, changed the diaper and put him back in bed without any interaction and without acknowledging him at all. I went in a third time. On the fourth time, I thought he was out of bed, but he was just laying there quietly in his bed. So, not to have him mistake good behavior for unacceptable behavior, I gave him a quick kiss, softly said "Thanks for staying in your bed," and left. A few minutes later, he was fast asleep. It was amazing.

Now, fast forward to today's naptime (I just put Vincente down about 10 minutes ago). I read him a few books, sang a few songs, and said "Have a nice nap." He got out of bed once, trying to get some more books. While I want Vincente to have a desire to read, I also want him to be a well rested child (this has become even more important to me after reading this book). So I gently put him back in his bed. He sat awake in his bed for a few minutes, talking to himself, or singing to himself. Just about two minutes ago I heard some noise, I thought was him playing with toys in his room. I cracked the door to check, and there he was, eyes closed (still sort of awake), snuggled in his bed with his blanket. He put himself to sleep even faster today than he did yesterday! It was amazing. 

Anyway, so Dr. Weissbluth's book has done two things 1.) taught me a LOT about sleep, and how important naps are for babies and young children, 2.) helped me teach Vincente how to stay in his bed at nap time - GONE are the days I spend an hour (or more!) laying with a crabby Vincente while he fights sleep. I hope I can keep consistant, so this will stick. And I'm much more convinced that it is SO important to allow Vincente a nap at 1 or 2 pm every day. Too bad Church interferes with that on Sundays. Maybe making the weekdays more regular will help with Sundays. I'll let you know!

dead battery

Today was going to be awesome. I was pretty much caught up on all the household chores, so this morning I was planning on taking the kids to the library. Vincente needs new books (and our books are due on Saturday) and I love getting out of the house. But no, Russ left the key on in his motorcycle yesterday, so the battery is dead and he had to drive the car. So much for the library. And since everything is mostly done already, I have absolutely nothing to do, nowhere to go, and I'm about to get Vincente down for a nap, but because we haven't done anything today, neither of us are really tired. We're even still in our pajamas. And it's too wet outside (not raining... everything is just wet) so I don't want to take Vincente outside. I can't wait for our trampoline to be up and useable. It will be so nice to let Vincente play outside and have him come back inside without having to strip him down and throw him in the bathtub.

Well, here I go to put Vince down for a nap, and then maybe read for a little bit? I'd watch a movie or something, but I don't really have any good ones to watch... nothing I'm in the mood for. *sigh* I almost want to get satellite with DVR/TiVo so I can record a bunch of good shows and watch them whenever I'm in the mood. Oh well, I just can't justify the extra expense...

My New Normal v.1.1

So here's (approximately) how things went down yesterday:

 9am - finally drag myself out of bed and feed Vincente breakfast, then nurse Joseline

10am - put Joseline down for a nap, do chores

11am - eat lunch with Russ

11:30 - head out for Park Day

1:30pm - come home and put Vince down for a nap, put away some laundry while Joseline decides whether or not to fall asleep

2:00pm - put Joseilne down for a nap, do more chores (sweep and dishes)

4:30pm - take a 30 minute nap while Vincente plays in the living room

5:00pm - wake up and play with Vincente - somewhere in there I nursed Joseline

6:00pm - start cooking dinner

6:45pm - eat dinner

8:00pm - get Vincente ready for bed

8:30pm - Vincente bedtime

9:30pm - Joseline went to bed

Joseline is getting a lot more efficient at nursing. She'll be done in 10 minutes or less at each breast. She just gulps it all down and then she's like "okay, I'm done." It's really nice - it's not like Vincente who would dink around for 15 minutes and then "be done" and then nurse again an hour later. She nurses for 20 minutes all around and then she's good for a few hours. Sometimes three hours. It's really nice. She just knows how to get her milk, I guess. 

Anyway, her nursing more efficiently does two amazing things for me 1.) takes up less time in the day, and 2.) gives me bigger windows of time to stick to my planned routine. 

Yesterday I was able to sweep the house (you may not be able to tell I swept, but I did! Stupid dirty, dusty house and hardwood floors), do all the dishes, put away the laundry, play with Vincente, and even blog a little bit. Oh yeah, AND we went to the park. I can't believe I had all the time. Today is shaping up to be just as good. :D 

My New Normal v. 1.0

I'm going to keep track of my evolving "new normal" here on my blog. So, here is my current very LOOSE outline for each day:

After last night-time feeding, or with Russ' alarm (whichever comes LATER) - get myself up and ready for the day

Feed Vincente breakfast

~put Joseline down for morning nap (somewhere here in the morning... she's still figuring out her favorite morning nap time... I'm thinking it's getting closer to 10am, which is perfect)

Do whatever chores I can (when chores are done, then 1 hour of computer, if I have time)

Around Noon - feed Vincente lunch

Around 1-2pm - put Vincente and Joseline down for a nap

While they're napping take a 1 hour nap, then finish chores or play on the computer

5:30pm - start making dinner

6:30pm - dinner time!!

7:30pm - start getting Vincente ready for bed

- clean up toys

- family prayer

- pajamas

- stories/songs

- lights out

8:30pm - Vincente bedtime

Go to bed whenever Joseline is finally ready (around 10-11pm)

Okay, so there it is. The morning is a lot less strictly scheduled than the evenings - probably because with Russ around in the evenings it's easier to get things done. 

Maybe I'll even post every day what the schedule was like the day before - that might help me find some trends that I can incorporate into my "new normal."

I'm almost having an anxiety attack just thinking about have a routine that changes every day... but it's okay, I can handle this!! I can find my new normal. 

finding my new normal

Thanks to all of you guys for the encouraging comments! I look up to all of you - kids or no kids! And Heather, you are definitely one of my biggest idols - I don't know how you do it - we haven't had nearly the trials you've had, and I still find myself barely able to tread water! Sometimes it looks like you're water-skiing through all the hard times - definitely a role model for me to look up to - I'm trying to find the tender mercies in every day. It's been really hard lately. Maybe I'll start posting them, too.

Heather is the one who keeps telling me that I have to find my "new normal" - and I'm seriously trying. Wow, it's hard! I used to have this nice routine down with Vince - I'd get myself ready before I even let him out of his room, and then after breakfast I would do my chores, then we would have lunch, then we'd go play outside, then naptime (and I would either nap or finish chores or play on the computer), then we'd get up and play inside until we started making dinner. After dinner it was off to bed. This schedule worked great for us. Now I find myself looking at the same schedule and wondering how on earth there will even be time for "normal."

It seems like the past few days have just worked out... but I didn't have a plan (and I'm a planner) so now I want to revise my daily routine/schedule, and I'm looking at the routine in disbelief, trying to figure out how to fit in getting dressed, doing chores, and naptime around 100 feedings. Okay, she doesn't nurse 100 times in a day, but sometimes it feels like that.

So when I sat down at the computer this morning to revise my daily schedule, I was feeling very positive. And then I quickly got very discouraged. So maybe I will make a really really general outline to use for the next few days, and then fill it in as things get a little more regular. I'll try to ease in to a "new normal" instead of forcing it on myself. I think that's my problem - I hate waiting, and I hate being in "limbo." I like to have a plan and be able to revise that plan if it isn't working. I guess that's what I'm doing... it's just a little more drawn out than I like.

I will definitely keep posting on how the "new normal" is going.

when the going gets tough

We thought Joseline would be a great sleeper... and she actually is... it's just been a little challenging to get her to go to sleep at night. She'll get tired, but then she'll "fall asleep" and two minutes later wake up again. She'll do this for hours 8-o

Last night she finally went to sleep around 11pm. It was much better than the last few nights - she'd been waiting until the wee hours of the morning to completely fall asleep. Last night she only woke up once (around 3) to nurse, and then went back to sleep until about 6am (when Russ gets up for work). I nursed her again and let her sleep until I got out of the shower at 9. So She really does sleep in good chunks, going right back to sleep after she nurses. It's been a rough week, though. Two nights ago it was like she wanted to go to sleep around 9pm, so I thought maybe she would do the same thing last night... it stinks being wrong. 

Well, once she permenantly goes to sleep, she stays asleep for a good 6-8 hours (with the one feeding in the middle, which doesn't seem to throw off  her sleeping pattern).

Now for my new mother ranting... 

I have been feeling really overwhelmed - like there's not enough time in the day to do everything I want to do. All the mothering books suggest just letting the housework go and not worrying about it for a while until you get the hang of being a new mom again. Unfortunately that doesn't work for me. I'm crankier if my house is messing. There are two things that I like to have done all the time - I like to be clean (i.e. take a shower) every day, and I like my house to be clean all the time. That means dishes done and floors swept and vacuumed and toys put away in the evening, and only a reasonable amount of laundry piling up (after a week at our house, laundry starts getting out of control). But it just seems like I don't have time to do all that and still take a little time to relax (which is another thing all the "experts" suggest). It's not relaxing to me to sit and put my feet up when my house is in a state of chaos. All that does is give me time to look around and mourn my loss of sanity and control. Which isn't very relaxing.

Anyway, as the saying goes, when the going gets tough, the tough get going. So yesterday I somehow made it work (mostly). I didn't take a shower (but I did this morning!) but I was able to get almost the entire house clean. Today I'm going to sweep the part of the house that got neglected yesterday, but in all, I'm basically pleased with what I got done yesterday - AND I got to take a nap, and make invitations for Vincente's birthday party this Saturday. 

I think I'll be able to make it. Things are getting easier. I still feel like the hours are eaten up by breastfeeding... It feels like I'm always feeding one kid or the other or cleaning up after one kid or the other or changing one kid or the other's diaper.

But I wouldn't trade jobs with anyone in the world.

what a wonderful world

This picture is mostly just because I feel like I need to post a picture when I post on my blog. It gives you readers a little more incentive to read ;) I've really appreciated all the comments on my blog - you guys all make me feel sooo loved and remembered (I miss all our old pals from the Y - we can't wait to be in Utah again to spend time with you, if you're still around!!)

Anyway, the picture above is Vincente admiring the fish we're fish-sitting for the Power family. He likes to feed them and thinks it's hilarious when they eat the food. A few days ago, Russ was sitting with Vincente at the fish tank and they were talking about the fish in Portuguese. It was the first time I've ever heard Vincente speak 100% Portuguese - he was actually having a "conversation" in Portuguese with Russ! It was great! He did the same thing again today for a while. It's funny because even though I speak some Portuguese with Vincente, he won't speak entirely in Portguese with me. It is really cool to see that his Portuguese language skills are developing. His English skills are still better, but his Portuguese skills (I would say) are mostly right on with a normal 2 year old. He is above level for his English speaking skills (I'd say his English speech skills are closer to 3 year old).

I took Joseline to the pediatrician yesterday, and I really really liked our pediatrician. I scheduled an appointment for Vincente's 2 year check up and Joseline's 1 month checkup. It was nice to have such a good pediatrician. She's really nice and helpful and she seemed to trust me as a mother, and was just really laid back. When I asked if it was okay that Joseline is sleeping 6-8 hours at night (I know - how did I get lucky and get the kid who sleeps all night!?), and the pediatrician was completely fine since Joseline is gaining weight and nursing well. I know some doctors just have their ideas they stick to and they would be like "No, you should wake her up!" I really like a doctor who is flexible and willing to look at you like you're an individual and have individual needs and abilities. I've never liked doctors very much (which is one reason I like my CNMs better than an OB - although I do really like my OB here - he's a lot like my midwives :D ), so it's nice to have a pediatrician I like.

The low-down on Joseline's first Dr visit:

8lbs 15oz

23 in. (probably not 100% accurate... I'm sure she hasn't grown 2.5 inches since birth... but you never know)

Dr. Lim (our ped) said she looks great! And since Joseline's not my first child, she said she didn't want me to come in for the weekly visit they usually recommend for newborns. We'll just see her at Joseline's 1 month checkup. What a relief - a pediatrician who trusts that if I feel like Joseline needs to be seen, I'll make sure she's seen, otherwise, she thinks I'll do a great job taking care of my newborn on my own.

Heh, speaking of which, I was grocery shopping today and I left Vince home with Russ and took Joseline with me (the easier of the two to take shopping... Joseline just slept the whole time). Anyway, I was just about done shopping and this old lady looks into Joseline's infant carrier and is like "How old is your baby?" I replied "About two weeks." Then this lady is like "Isn't it a little early to have her out?" or something to that effect. I said "Oh, I think she's fine." But what I wanted to say was "Not if people like you don't come breathe on her." But that would have been mean. Really, though, if you see a tiny newborn baby and you're honestly concerned about them being out and around people with all their nasty germs wouldn't you stay the heck away? But no - the people who are the most "concerned" about you having your newborn out in the world are the ones who want to stick their germ-infested fingers in your infant carrier and poke at your baby and lean their heads in and breathe their disease infested breath into your child's face. If people like that just kept their hands and breath to themselves, it would be perfectly fine for me to take my newborn out.

Okay, enough of my ranting. This post is too long as it is.

Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday, Baby!

My precious little boy is turning two!

Here are some highlights of Vincente's 2nd Year...

Perfecting his various talents -

Walking

Coloring

Exploring

Taking care of responsibilities -

Watering the dogs

Doing his homework

Catching the bus

Returning phone calls

Getting a haircut

Learning new things -

Ice Skating

Peeing in the potty

Small engine repair

Sign language

Massage Therapy

Baking cookies

Just goofing off -

Climbing in boxes

Building forts

Discovering the ocean

Vincente, when you came into our lives, it was like we found sunshine all over again. We love the energy you have - even when you wear us out! You are so smart, and we are so proud of all you have learned in such a short time! There is so much more to learn, and we are confident that you will be great at learning it. You're such an obedient little boy, and so good to your little sister. We couldn't ask for a better little boy. We've enjoyed watching you grow this past year, and we look forward to what this next year will bring!

Happy Birthday, Baby!

Love, 

Mamãe e Papai

sleepy house

Nap time today was wonderful. 

Vincente fell asleep on the couch watching Monsters, Inc. I don't really endorse using the TV for a babysitter or to put him down for a nap, but his shows have sure been life savers this past week. Figuring out how to take care of a two year old and a newborn at the same time has been a very... interesting experience for me. By that I basically mean it's the hardest thing I've ever done.

     

Joseline fell asleep easily after nursing for a while (she's actually really awesome - she falls asleep AFTER she nurses... most of the time. Sometimes she's falls asleep while she's nursing, but so far if she's sleepy we've been able to get her to sleep without nursing. It's awesome!)

      

The best part about nap time today was that I got a nap, too. Only about an hour, but I didn't have a nap yesterday, and if there's one thing I've been needing this past week, it's naps. I've decided that starting tomorrow (Wednesday) I am going to get back to normal life. I think I've got a good handle on how to do the two kids at once. Right now, with her nursing so often, it takes a little more time than usual. In a few months, when she doesn't nurse as often, things should be a little easier. But I can do it now. In fact, I may even stop by the part for a little bit tomorrow after Joseline's check up. And on Friday I think I'll actually take Vincente to our playgroup at ACS. I just really feel like I need to get back into my normal activities. It just seems like I don't have enough time in the day because I'm always nursing. And it's hard to do things when Joseline's awake... and hard to do things when she's asleep (unless Vince is asleep, too).

I'll let you know how things go tomorrow...